originally posted 11/24/2011
I am the wife of a RSO. I did not know my husband at the time of his conviction but know his story very well. When my husband was 22, he was at a friend’s house drinking. He started talking to a girl who said she was 18. As the night went on, they both continued drinking and ended up having sex. It turns out she was only 17. She went to school and talked like teenage girls tend to do and was overheard. My husband was arrested and charged with consensual sex with a minor.
Only people close to him know about his crime. It was a long time after we met that he finally told me. People ran away from him since the time of his conviction all because he is a sex offender. Since he is only a level one offender, he will be able to stop registering after 15 years. However, he will still be labeled by many people.
We live in a town of less than 5,000 people. Work is impossible for to him to find. We have three children, and it is extremely hard to support them by myself. The only reason why we have a roof overhead and food in our stomach is because an angel I call mother lets us live with her. We are excluded from numerous state aid programs because he is a RSO.
He will admit what he did was wrong and says he regrets it every day. However, he served his time, did his probation and never failed to register. Even though it was consensual sex, it is still considered a violent crime.
In my experience when people hear sex offender, they automatically assume child molester. That is far from what my husband is. He is considered a very low risk of repeat offense but is in the same group as someone who actually is a child molester. I don’t see how that is logical. I fully believe each case needs to be looked at individually and not grouped all together. Society has pushed my husband away instead of helping him. That not only affects him but our children and my self as well.
I, and the rest of my family, completely support what you are doing here. Keep up the good work!