Still Together After Humiliation, Jail, and Torture

originally posted 11/6/2010 My husband is not a child sexual abuser. We met when I was 14 and he was 26 and fell in love and had a beautiful daughter. We are still together today after jail, humiliation, and torture.

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Son So Scared on Halloween!

originally posted 11/3/2010 This is from my mother. ok here it goes: my mom sits and cries everyday because my brother is on the sex offender list and she is so scared for him. �and on october 31st halloween day the police showed up to our house and searched my brother’s room and then asked where he was at and we told him he was at dinner with my mother. and then when i told my mother she broke down and cried again and it hurt my family so bad. and my brother isnt a bad person at all. he got caught up in a mess with a girl who said she really wanted to be with him and he is very mentally ill and mentally retarted and has problems. and we are working with him. he is on probation for five years and he is going thru mental health and he is in anger management classes also and he…

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Just a Simple Wife!

originally posted 10/31/2010 Just a simple wife who has been with my husband from the beginning of his incarceration.  I went with my husband to the sex offender treatment program (SOTP) once he was out of prison.  He completed it in the program once while he was in prison!!!  Seems ridiculous to have to complete the program two times, but that is my state for you.   It is ridiculous, all the BS one has to go through for the so called safety of our children.    Not only is the offender under the microscope but so are his family members.   I didn’t make a good impression at the first SOTP meeting we had to attend and they contacted his probation officer and then basically chewed his ass because of it!!!  My husband did his time day for day, completed the SOTP in prison and when he was released, it was a conditional release (three years probation) and had…

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Another Bad Plea – 17 Year-Old’s Face on Internet

originally posted 10/31/2010 My son was charged with 2 counts of indecent liberties with a minor.  One count was for kissing a girl on the cheek and the other was for accidentally brushing her breast when she jumped from him tickling her.  She was 12 yrs old and he was 17.  My son is learning disabled, developmentally delayed, and has ADHD.   His emotional and maturity level were the same as the 12 year old girl’s.   Due to it being his first offense, documentation of his disabilities, and letters written by the girl, my son was given a plea bargain to plead guilty to two counts of assault on a child.  He was given tw0 years probation which he has completed.  He is now 20 years old and is having a difficult time finding a job due to his conviction. He was arrested in February of 2007.  His face was plastered all over the local news even though he…

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Will Activism Soothe My Fury?

originally posted 10/24/2010 I am struggling with my complete inability to help my son, who pled guilty to Continuous Sexual Abuse of a Child Under 12 and Dangerous Crimes Against a Child last January.   He is serving 16.5 years in a stinking, sweat-house prison.   No parole, no time off for good behavior and lifetime SO registry.   My state doesn’t even pretend to offer rehab of any kind to any inmate.   He is getting 2 meals a day, one a sack meal. I am the child of a lifelong child molester.   I educated my kids thoroughly about my dad & his predilections ~ and yet this happened. I have no one to talk to.   My mother retreats into martyrdom and stoic silence.   Everyone else just says we have to wait and let my son’s sentence run its course, then we’ll help.   But I’m 55.   I may not live to see him free.   Every sense…

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A Lifetime of Judgment – Another bad Plea

originally posted 10/24/2010 I am the father of two wonderful daughters and the husband of the best woman in the world.  I have been convicted of child molesting.  Our family had a babysitter who started using drugs and drinking and smoking cigarettes, so my wife and I decided to let her go.   She then went to the police with allegations that I grabbed her breast over the top of her clothes with the intent to sexually gratify myself.   After two hours of questioning the detective told me the he would draft up the papers and pass them to the DA to see if charges should be filed.   Five months later, ten police officers showed up at my work and handcuffed me.   I bailed and hired a lawyer.   He told me the DA here likes the spaghetti theory which is toss it at the wall and see if it sticks.   The judge told me if…

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Empowered By Your Site

originally posted 10/21/2010 I am still going through all of the various links on the RSOL website and am feeling more and more empowered with each section that I read.  I am a registered sex offender and can say that the time I spent in corrections and therapy was all time well spent and of immeasurable benefit to me as a person in general, I grew very much from the experience.  Having said that, I find the registry accomplishes exactly the opposite by stunting social development and regressing all the progress gained from counseling.  I live in constant fear of being ousted by business associates (I have in fact lost business due to my being on the registry) or friends or other people who have no business knowing my record before I feel comfortable telling them, if I choose to share it with them at all.  It is very dehumanizing and instills a deep sense of shame.  It has affected…

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Living a Death Sentence

originally posted 10/19/2010 When my son was sentenced,  I was his defense.  His court appointed attorney slept through it. Another attorney came in and said to plead guilty or he would get triple the fine–a no win situation.  I explained the situation to the judge:  How the family had accepted the relationship until my son quit managing their business, how the family had had our son over for dinner and let the girl come over here at night.   The judge looked disgusted at the stepfather sitting there but said his hands were tied.   The girl apologized for her stepfather but it was out of her hands.  They never had sex but messed around pretty good.   He left this town because it is a small town and the newspaper reported like he was a number one criminal.  We know that was not good but it was a coping mechanism. Our son is now in jail in another state,…

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Bipolar Disorder Leads to Risky Behavior

originally posted 10/8/2010 I would like to discuss our SEX OFFENDER Registry with you.  Please hear me out.  I am a wife of a Sex Offender and I want to tell my story.  I married my husband in 2003, he came from a very good family, his dad and brother are ministers, his other brother is a lawyer and his sister is an engineer. My husband retired from the United States Navy in 1995. We had a good life.  I am not sure when this problem arose but in 2009, my son found a camera at the end of my in-home tanning bed and turned it over to the police.  That brings us to present day nightmare:  On the hard drive the investigation found six videos of two girls (at the time they would have been 15 years old ) the deleted videos from back in 2008 were all that was found on the hard drive. My husband was arrested…

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I’m Not a Sex Offender at All!

originally posted 04.10.2010 I have never been in trouble with the law until now; I have had a clean record and now I will be labeled as a registered sex offender.   I make one mistake, the county of Hanover gives me probation and I am on some stupid list for the rest of my life unless someone can get it expunged. Plus I was diagnosed with Asberger’s.   The law needs to be changed so lowest class sex offenders do not go to jail or serve probation or be put on the stupid piece of garbage list.   They should be able to travel out of state without permission and leave the country as well.   I could see not letting violent offenders do that but I am not one of them; in fact I am not one at all…………………………..

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